Of course, this may sound silly, but your wife will be more attracted to you if you just be a man. More attraction means more desire which will help increase her libido. Yes you are a man, but do you act like one? I mean no insult, so please give me a chance. I used to think I was being a man but found out I was looking different than I felt: I came off as indecisive, not confident, and a push over. The problem: I was a super nice guy. I still am a nice guy, but I have made a few changes. You don't have to be a super macho guy to be a man. In fact, if you are super macho, be sure it's workin' for her – she may think it's over the top – find out. In any case, you may be doing things you think are nice that she thinks are actually unattractive.
Here's one thing that can drive her nuts, for example:
Her: "Where do you want to go for dinner?"
Him: "It doesn't matter to me – where would you like to go?"
Her: "I don't know. What do you think?"
Him: "Whatever you want."
Ok – you may be thinking you're being nice to let her pick, but your indecision will drive her crazy. At this point, she is thinking: "For God's sake! Be a man and make a decision for crying out loud!"
So make the call. After all: you should know what kinds of food she likes. So pick a place. If she says "no, I'm not in the mood for that" then pick two or three others from the list of places you know you and she both like and say "ok – we can do A, B or C – which one are you in the mood for?" If she still doesn't pick, then you pick one and say "ok – I know – let's go and I'll decide on the way" – then go there. Same goes for "where do you want to go", "what movie do you want to see", "what do you want to do tonight", etc.
Bottom line: make a choice – then make the call.
Sticking up for yourself and her. If you get ripped off or get unsatisfactory service, don't just be nice: say something! If your food (or her food) is not up to par – at the very least, let the restaurant staff know about it. If the service is slow: get up and ask for a manager. If your wife says it's chilly at, for example, a banquette, then you get up, find a manager and ask them to turn the temp up. But in all cases be nice about it. Just because you're not happy doesn't mean you should be a jerk – your wife will appreciate you being nice, but firm about sticking up for yourself and for her.
Drive. When we go on family trips, I almost always drive. It's seems to be part of leading. You lead, you drive. Of course, there have been times I wanted to bring the laptop and write, so she drives – or she'll drive if I want to have a drink – but for the most part, I drive. You may consider it.
Be dependable. If you make a promise or commitment, keep it. Nothing is worse than a man who does not keep his word. Such a man does not exhibit trustworthiness and honor. The world needs men with honor – and your wife needs a man with honor. Plus: we have to be the examples for our children – so keep promises and stick to your commitments.
Be chivalrous. Open doors for your wife. Let her go first. Order her meals for her or let her order first. Rise when she gets up. Carry her over a puddle (your wife will probably get mad if you ruin your $220 leather coat by throwing it down for her to walk on – oh, and don't drop her!) – or of course you could just go around. Help carry her bags and things. Share your umbrella. You get the point – basically, take care of her. Be a man.
Be kind to strangers. Men should make it a point to be kind to people. If you are strong and kind, you're wife will take note and love going places with you. She wants people to say things like: "Wow, Lisa is so lucky to have such a good man for a husband." Her passion will grow and her desire for you will be on the rise.
I hope this gets your mind moving. Women like men to be men. Be a good husband and lead by your example. These are not outdated ideas – but they have been watered down by modern society and the effort to make everyone the same. We are not the same. We are husbands and wives. We are equal but in different roles – neither more important than the other and both vital to the other. Remember that.